This may take you some time to read.
There is this person on a forum(about the work of Joe Michael Straczinsky) that I frequently visit. His nickname is Der Mike. He posts only in one or two threads on the off-topic forum, but when He does He is right. Because He is Der Mike and He is always right. Even when He is not, Der Mike is right. So bow before Der Mike and shower him with gifts. Because He is always right.
Some links to direct postings. Read it and be amazed. This takes trolling to a whole new level for me.
First we use the Qu'ran for loo-paper.
Then, according to Der Mike, the american people don't have to show any compassion or whatever towards non-american citizens and they do not have to apply their own principles to foreigners. But still they do, just because they are such nice people.
Next is the Supreme Court, who have no right to decide if someone has the right to an attorney of not. Oh yeah; and obviously my thoughts aren't worth anything compared to the Words of Wisdom of Der Mike.
If you don't say and believe exactly what your government says you are a radical left-wing commie. George Knows Best!
It just so happens that Kaiser Mike mixes up the names of the people he is responding to. But to a giant such as Der Mike this is of no significance.
In the meantime, The Honoured One has decided to change my nickname. And along the way he states that there was no torture in Iraq, as a matter of fact "I would kill for our soldiers to be treated as humanely as we treated the subhumans opposing us". Well done Sir! Sub-humans, of course! How obvious! May I point out that subhumans translates into German as "untermensch"? It does give it a more fascist overtone doesn't it?
Oh yes: and after Theo van Gogh was murdered the only response from the dutch was to be nice to the muslims. There were no burning churches, there were no death-threats, absolutely not! He should know, for He is Der Mike.
In response to a remark about the dead civilian Iraqis, Our Lord and Saviour states that nothing is true. There are no massacres in Iraq because the Jenin massacre was not true either. I guess that's also why they don't have to count dead Iraqis: there ARE no dead Iraqis. At least none we speak of...
And again, I don't know anything about Van Gogh, Der Mike Knows All though. I take it that Our Mike especially learned dutch so he could check out http://www.degezonderoker.nl
But wait: we were talking about Iraq. And we'd better talk politely, or we are the devil's spawn. Paid by Saddam Hussein.
The brilliant Der Mike of course needs proof. Not, that anybody sees any links from Der Mike himself. They must be too highly classified to divulge to the public...
But on we go: to Iraq to dismantle the Weapon of Mass Distraction. Although, after long deliberation Der Mike decides that only 'some' of the WMD's were not destroyed.
Here is some more denial and the first mention of him 'getting personal'... The fact that he has been hammering away at everyone is of no importance. For He is Der Mike.
Of course everything is a left-wing conspiracy, not to be believed ever...
On to the subject of James Hatfield, the deceased writer of 'Fortunate Son', a book about George W. Bush. And yes, I DO know what Soft Skull Publishing is and I knew all about James Hatfield's criminal record years ago.
"I don't need to read a book before I condemn it..."
"Only people who think like me are right. I really don't give a fuck about what you say, only I am important here." Now let's have a discussion...
Here's a whole new question from DM. Which I'm sure he will also give the answer to soon...
AIDS is of course a left-wing conspiracy. I knew that...
But hold on! It's not just Europe and the Middle East: according to our saviour, Mexico is a corrupt shitheap.
Of course no Der Mike would be a REAL Der Mike if he wouldn't rehash an old posting of mine. Of course Mr. Mike does not publish a reference, supplies no links, quotes out of context, and names no author.
And in comes Mr. Godwin! I wondered where he was.
Ah but Mr. Mike did not publish my nickname and the link to the original article to PROTECT me! Isn't he a dearheart?
Denying denial! Lovely...
And of course meanwhile in Iraq, the Qu'ran is a violent and cruel book(TM: true) as opposed to The Bible...
In the meantime Mike solves global pollution, there IS NO GLOBAL WARMING! Get that through your thick skull! Thank God for this man, this giant, our hero! I'll sleep so much better now.
Oh, did I mention that Mexico is a shitheap?. And yet another fellow-forumposter is affronted. But of course Kaiser Mike would NEVER stoop to personal insults as I would...
Of course it is completely unimportant that the fellow-forumposter may not come from Mexico at all...
The benign Deity lovingly permits another person to speak too.
And for the record : 'We can do without your kind'is NOT a personal insult. And neither is calling a country a shitheap in the face of someone of whom you THINK he lives there. It is only when others do this that it is called 'insulting'. When Kaiser Mike does it it's called 'honesty' and 'frankness'.
Obviously - who could have doubted it? - Der Mike is a trained theologian. So he can explain in fine details why it is that the baptists are a religious sect. On the same note; so is the catholic church. How they ever managed to agree on never ever changing the contents of the Bible is way beyond me though.
I give Der Mike a 9.8 for trolling. He wins the 2005 Troll-Award.
